If You're Gone...songfic
by Mercury
Summary: Songfic to the Matchbox 20 song. PG for yaoi, Daiken style. But it's not much...also, Hikari Takaishi and Cynthia, Piedmon's Lady: My contest notes are inside, too, so I didn't have to post a non-fic. Please read and review everyone! ....


-----------------------------------------------------------------------  
WARNINGS:  
This is a Daiken. I swear I'll write something non-romantic and non-Ken someday! After three fics in a row about Davis and Ken romantically, I'll take a break. ^-^ Be warned. Yaoi. But not a lot of it.  
  
NOTES:  
I heard this song on the radio one time. I heard the line "I though this place was an empire". My Ken 'problem' took over and I went online to find the lyircs. I don't know if they're exact or not.  
  
By the way, I only had two entries for the contest I was hosting. One was by Hikari Takaishi and the other was by Cynthia, Piedmon's Lady. Since I only had two, I'll write a fic for both of you if you want, okay? But if you hate my writing or something, I understand. I thought both entries were marvelous!  
  
I started this at 6:00 PM CST on 11-23-00 and finished it at 7:26 PM CST on 11-23-00....in case anyone cares!  
  
DISCLAIMER:  
I don't own Digimon; various other people who will one day turn up sporked and dead do. I don't own the song "If You're Gone"; Matchbox 20 does. Enjoy!  
-----------------------------------------------------------------------  
  
'If You're Gone' songfic  
by Mercury  
  
  
I was...I was nervous. He was mine for one night. One night when we had confessed everything to each other. Somehow he and I were able to have a sane conversation, without the fighting.  
  
But as morning dawned and I watched him sleeping peacefully nearby, I knew I'd have to give him up soon. I was almost afraid to find out what would happen the next time we fought.  
  
~I think I've already lost you  
I think you're already gone  
I think I'm finally scared now~  
  
I recalled the previous evening's conversation. He had said he thought I loved him. At first I laughed, telling him that love was a weak emotion. Sure, like I really loved anyone.  
  
~You think I'm weak  
I think you're wrong~  
  
But as I listened to his soft snores, I grew sad tho think about when he would awaken and leave me alone again. Maybe...maybe I was in love.  
  
~I think you're already leaving  
Feels like your hand is on the door~  
  
He stirred finally and looked at me, his brown eyes misted with sleep. Not saying a word, he sat up and looked me in the eyes.  
  
I felt myself fall serenely out of the tense state I had previously been in, just by gazing into those gorgeous eyes. I let all the worries of my life melt away...  
  
~I thought this place was an empire  
But now I'm relaxed  
I can't be sure~  
  
I could have stared into those eyes forever, but all too soon he turned away.  
  
"No," he said flatly. "This should have never happened."  
  
~I think you're so mean~  
  
"It might work out," I replied quickly.  
  
~I think we should try~  
  
He looked at me and smirked. "I thought love was weak?"  
  
~I think I could need  
This in my life~  
  
"I..."  
  
He didn't let me finish as he stood to leave.  
  
~I think I'm scared  
I think too much~  
  
He narrowed his eyes. Suddenly I questioned my judgement--not for loving another male, but for lving someone who was so against me. But still I couldn't stand to think about when he would leave.  
  
~I know this is wrong  
It's a problem I'm dealing  
If you're gone~  
  
"If you weren't who you are, this would be a much easier relationship," he shot.  
  
My mind went blank except the resounding noise of his words. If I was someone different...  
  
~Maybe it's time to come home  
There's an awful lot of breathing room  
But I can hardly move~  
  
"Please don't leave yet," I whispered. If he heard me or not I didn't know, but I continued, speaking barely above silence. "You can stay here. We have more in common than you think."  
  
~If you're gone  
Baby you need to come home  
There's a little bit of something in me  
In everything in you~  
  
He slowly sat down again, looking me over.  
  
"Give me a minute and maybe I can think of a way to convince you not to leave." I racked my brains in distressed thoughts. It was so hard to concentrate with him watching me.  
  
~I bet you're hard to get over  
I bet the moon just won't shine~  
  
"Why are you so afraid of me leaving?" he asked.  
  
"Because I'll have to fight you," I answered.  
  
After a long silence, he cleared his throat. "You know, you can't stay here forever."  
  
"Yes I can."  
  
Then he changed the subject to avoid an argument. "I don't...that is...I don't mind you loving me. But the others..." He trailed off.  
  
~I bet my hands I can stay here  
I bet you need more than you mind~  
  
I fell quiet and waited to hear him get up and leave. But I knew he was staring at me, and I knew I'd go crazy if he did for much longer.  
  
I could love him. I could, and I might even enjoy it.  
  
~I think you're so mean  
I think we should try  
I think I could need  
This in my life~  
  
"But," he continued, "it would be hard for me to love you, with the knowledge I have of what you've done--"  
  
I cut him off. "I could say the same thing about you. I'm seeing this from the antagonistic point of veiw, remember?" I tried to cover up my confusion and sadness with my usual arrogance and conceit.  
  
~I think I'm scared  
That I know too much  
I can't relate and  
That's a problem I'm feeling  
If you're gone~  
  
"You don't have to be the 'antagonist'. You can change." I felt his hand, so gentle, against my cheek.  
  
~Maybe it's time to come home  
There's an awful lot of breathing room  
But I can hardly move  
If you're gone~  
  
"Or...you could change," I pointed out. "Join me. We'd be together..."  
  
He frowned and shook his head, taking his hand away from my face. "I'm already worried about what you said earlier. 'We have more in common than you think'. That's not good for me."  
  
~Baby you need to come home  
There's a little bit of something in me  
In everything in you~  
  
I stared vacantly at the floor and ran this through my head. He was hurting me so much by turning me down. There is a first time for everything...if only I could make him see that. Even for someone like me to love someone like him...there's always a first time.  
  
~I think you're so mean  
I think we should try  
I think I could need  
This in my life~  
  
The sun was fully risen by now. Apparently he realized that, as he stood to look out the small window.  
  
"I don't want to fight you," he announced.  
  
"Then don't!" I pleaded. "I think I'd kill myself before I'd kill you."  
  
~I think I'm scared   
Do I talk too much?  
I know it's wrong  
It's a problem I'm dealing  
If you're gone~  
  
"This is my goodby for now," he intoned. "Until we love again."  
  
I gulped. I should have been the one causing him all the pain...but I wasn't. I considered throwing myself at his mercy and begging for forgiveness, but I was already feeling uncharacteristic as it was.  
  
~Maybe it's time to come home  
There's an awful lot of breathing room  
But I can hardly move  
If you're gone  
Baby you need to come home~  
  
I stood beside him and forced myself to face him. I would be the stronger in this conversation. I would not let him change me. So I told myself.  
  
He pulled me into a swift kiss that I was more than happy to return. Too soon...much too soon...he walked away.  
  
~There's a little bit of something in me  
In everything in you~  
  
"Goodbye, Ken," he called back faintly.  
  
I choked back my sobs as I watched him leave.  
  
"Goodbye, Daisuke," I whispered.  
  
-----------------------------------------------------------------------  
*sighh...* I'm depressed...my dog that I sort of share with my cousin got shot and killed...*bursts into tears* And they just now told me! I'm so sad...poor Spottie......*wails* He was too little to hurt anyone...*sniffle* Stupid drunk person. Didn't have to shoot Spottie...  
----------------------------------------------------------------------- 


End file.
